Slimpickins's Weblog

January 23, 2014

How you make me feel

Based on how you have treated me over the past 16 months, this is how you feel about me:

1. My feelings don’t matter
2. What I like to do doesn’t matter
3. I am expected to do everything you like, but you won’t do anything I like
4. Touch and Kisses only happen when you want them, or feel it
5. You have no desire for me
6. I am fun to hang out with and do things with that are outside and keep you busy
7. You like to shower with me, but not touch my body
8. Motorcycles and Cars are more important to you than I am
9. You are Selfish
10. You will tell me things just to get me to shut up or do what you want; with no intention of following through with what you say.
11. You like to put me down and tell me everything I do that is wrong
12. You don’t like to talk to me
13. You don’t like me to touch you
14. If I say something more than once (within the relationship) I am nagging

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Relationship Rules… (for everyone)

Filed under: General Stuff — Tags: , , , , , — slimpickins @ 8:27 am

Why must we always have man’s rules and women’s rules? Here are some relationship rules:

PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!

1. PEOPLE ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. INTIMACY IS IMPORTANT. YOU DON’T NEED SEX FOR INTIMACY, BUT IT IS NICE.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU’RE A BIG PERSON. IF IT’S UP, PUT IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. SAYING WHAT YOU THINK I WANT TO HEAR ONLY CAUSES MORE ISSUES, JUST BE HONEST.
1. YOU KNOW THAT PERSON YOU WHERE WHEN WE STARTED DATING AND ALL THOSE THINGS YOU DID FOR ME? DON’T STOP BEING THAT PERSON OR DOING THOSE THINGS DURING THE RELATIONSHIP. WE STARTED DATING YOU FOR A REASON, NOT FOR YOU TO GIVE UP ONCE WE WERE TOGETHER.
1. IF YOU ARE DONE WITH ME OR THE RELATIONSHIP, THEN LEAVE. WE WOULD RATHER HEAR THE TRUTH THAN BE CHEATED ON.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:
SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU’RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON’T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE…
1. IF YOU WOULDN’T WANT TO HEAR ME SAY IT TO YOU, THEN DON’T SAY IT TO ME.
1. DON’T USE SEX AS A WEAPON, WITHHOLDING SEX DOES NOT FIX ANYTHING BUT CAUSE MORE PROBLEMS.
1. TOO MUCH SEX AND NO SEX ARE BOTH ISSUES, FIGURE OUT WHERE IN THE MIDDLE YOU BOTH FIT.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY ‘NOTHING,’ WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING’S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON’T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE…REALLY.
1.. DON’T ASK US WHAT WE’RE THINKING ABOUT BECAUSE IT WON’T BE ANYTHING YOU WANT TO HEAR ANYWAY.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES, TOOLS, CARS, MOTORCYCLES, SHOES, ETC.
1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!
1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT WHAT IS DIFFERENT?
1. COMPROMISE, COMPROMISE, COMPROMISE… DO THINGS THE OTHER PERSON LIKES EVEN IF YOU DON’T JUST TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH THE OTHER PERSON.
1. COMMUNICATION IS KEY, TALK ABOUT WHAT IS GOING ON.

January 14, 2014

Caught Red Mouthed…

Filed under: Photo Journal — slimpickins @ 11:17 am

image

Ginger decided that while I was taking a bath she was going to go through the bedroom trash and pull out and eat all of the used tissues. She ran by me and I saw something hanging from her mouth. When I called her to me, this is what I saw…

image

January 7, 2014

Too much worry in my head…

Filed under: Emotional Stuffs — Tags: , , , , , , , — slimpickins @ 2:43 pm

There is way too much worry in my head. I am worried about things that I 1) have no control over and 2) have no idea how they will turn out. I can’t stop thinking about them though.

The main thought/worry in my head is regarding my boyfriend and sex. It has been 5 months since there was any sexual interaction between us. He has a medical condition that needs to be addressed and so far it is not being addressed. I still desire him sexually, however, he has made some comments over the past year regarding sex or sexual contact that I am struggling to get out of my head. I know they aren’t true, but I am still struggling to eradicate the thoughts from my mind. They hurt me deeply and I still struggle to figure out why someone would say those things to another person (even if you thought them to yourself).

I am worried that once he is finally ready to have sex again that I won’t be able to connect to him anymore due to everything that has gone on. I love him dearly, but I still feel hurt deep inside. He knows that I am hurt and he doesn’t understand why I can’t just let it all go.

Some of the things said to me in his most depressed moments (due to his medical condition and lack of desire for sexual contact):

* I can’t feel anything you must be too loose for me. Maybe you should try Kegals. (I already do kegals)
* I just can’t get off with you, “so and so” didn’t have a problem.
* It’s a chore to have sex.
* I have been willing myself for months into having sex and I just don’t feel anything. Now I just can’t will myself anymore into sex.

Add “with you” to all of those statements and that is how I feel when I hear those. I know it isn’t me, I know it’s just his lack of sexual desire due to his medical condition. However it stings and hurts just the same.

I feel undesired sexually. I feel like there must be something wrong with me, even though I know it’s not. I feel hurt and betrayed from the harsh words uttered even if they aren’t true.

It is harder to deal with the negative talking when I don’t get the positive physical attention to uplift myself and counter the negativity.

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