Slimpickins's Weblog

October 24, 2013

Giving up…

Filed under: Emotional Stuffs — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , — slimpickins @ 11:42 am

Damned if I do.. Damned if I don’t.. I give up… I concede….

I am tired of fighting to get time and affection. I am tired of being a friend and a roommate and nothing more. I am tired of crying and feeling ignored. I am tired of making you angry. I guess I should just give up.

I have a hard time giving up and conceding. I don’t like to give up, I always give everything 10,000 % especially to other people. My health can no longer take it. I need to make a decision and stick by it.

I feel silly asking for affection, intimacy or time to be spent with me. I am done asking for it, if you don’t want to be with me then don’t be with me. I am tired of chasing after the simple things that make me feel special and important and LOVED.

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October 17, 2013

Ho Hum… Doldrum of a day/week/month

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , — slimpickins @ 7:40 pm

I am feeling very Ho Hum lately.. Like I am stuck in a doldrums of a situation. I do not know how to fix it. I think I know what the problem is, but I am not sure how to correct it. I have not had any intimacy for just a bit over a month. I am sure that is part of the issue but the question is if that is the full problem. Not yet sure if that is all that is going on with me, or if there is a lot more to deal with. I am sure that it’s mostly in my head, and I am trying to get out of my head and back into my heart and soul.

Any ideas on how to get out of my head and back into my heart and soul? Please find the switch and come over and turn it off. Thank you!!!

October 10, 2013

Ginger Turns 10 years old…

Filed under: Photo Journal — slimpickins @ 4:49 pm

My little Rock, the love of my life, my best friend… turned 10 last week… here are some photos of her. 🙂

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October 7, 2013

Feeling Low…

Filed under: Emotional Stuffs — Tags: , , , — slimpickins @ 1:30 pm

Feeling low today. I am moving all of my stuff and into my boyfriend’s house. I should be excited and happy. The more I bring over the further he pulls from me. Or at least this is how I perceive it. It makes me sad. It is like he doesn’t want to be around me. All he wants to do is sleep and he says that he hasn’t changed his mind on me moving in (which is good because my notice is already in for leaving my apartment). I always looked forward to the weekends as that is when we slept together and cuddled. Not many cuddles this past weekend and no sleeping in.

It’s probably just me. I will push it off on myself anyways…

October 6, 2013

Zombie Photoshoot 2013

Filed under: Emotional Stuffs, General Life Updates, Photo Journal — slimpickins @ 3:59 am

So tonight was the 4th Annual Zombie Photoshoot… I had a blast getting my zombie makeup on and then posing for professional photos. It really is a neat and exciting event every year.

Last year my boyfriend went with me and he stood in the freezing cold with me and hung out during the photos and talked with me between takes. This year he drove me there and there it ended. He didn’t come in and talk to me or hang out with me. He was bored… So I guess I know next year not to have him come with me.

This saddens me a little as I do a lot of things that he enjoys even though I do not like them. I wish that he could do this with me even if he doesn’t really enjoy it. Le Sigh…. I guess I am just a lonely zombie after-all.

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